Last night I posted on facebook that I had been a bit down and too exhausted to make supper, so Ian had brought me a plate of cheese and crackers in bed. I did think it was sweet, and that’s why I posted it.

But consequently, I then had to spend today badmouthing him because I can’t stand how people always venerate a man who behaves even slightly like a human being.

If your spouse is so sick or exhausted that they sleep through supper and then they get up and then burst into tears because of exhaustion + you didn’t make or save any supper for them and so you bring them a plate of crackers that is a baseline of basic human compassionate behaviour. I posted it because I was all “this is kind of sweet and nicely put together and it is kind of making me feel better” but then I got told “cheer up, what a lovely husband” and “so nice of Ian to cheer you up like that”, etc. And things that implied that I shirked my supper duties and he’s amazing and I better not push it on that moping around thing.

Even without the backstory – If Ian said just the same basic facts that I did: “I was so exhausted when I got home from work. Megan brought me a plate of cheese and crackers for supper” – Not only would people probably not spend the day telling him how goddamn lucky he is and that he should cheer up, some would even say “You had that exhausting a day and she couldn’t be bothered to get you anything better than snacks? That sucks.”

All that being said, yes, it is awesome to have a husband who is capable of being a decent human being.